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The Temperament God Gave You: The Classic Key to Knowing Yourself, Getting Along with Others, and Growing Closer to the Lord, by Art Bennett Laraine Bennett
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From the Inside Flap
All of us are born with distinct personality traits. Some of us live for crowds and parties; others seek solitude and time for quiet reflection. Some of us are naturally pushy, while others are content just to get along. We don't pick and choose these traits; they're just part of the way we're made. For in the womb God doesn't merely mold our body; He also gives us the temperament that, all our days, colors our understanding, guides our choices, and serves as the foundation of our moral and spiritual life. Ancient philosophers identified four basic temperaments, and over the centuries, countless wise souls have used these four to understand human nature. Now comes The Temperament God Gave You, the first Catholic book on the subject in 70 years. Here veteran Catholic counselor Art Bennett and his wife Laraine provide an accessible synthesis of classical wisdom, modern counseling science, and Catholic spirituality: a rich understanding of the temperaments and what they mean for you and for your family. Drawing on decades of study, prayer, and practical experience, Art and Laraine show you how to identify your own temperament and use it to become what God is calling you to be: a loving spouse, an effective parent, and a good friend. Best of all, they give you a Catholic understanding of the four temperaments that will bring you closer to God and help you discover the path to holiness that's right for you. Peace. Happiness. Holiness. You'll find yourself growing in each of these qualities as you come to understand -- and learn to use as you should the temperament God gave you.
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About the Author
Art Bennett is a licensed marriage and family therapist with twenty years' experience in the field. He currently serves as president of Catholic Charities in the Diocese of Arlington, and he writes a monthly column for the National Catholic Register. Art's wife, Laraine, is a freelance writer whose articles appear in Catholic journals.
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Product details
Paperback: 288 pages
Publisher: Sophia Institute Press; 41827th edition (June 15, 2005)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1933184027
ISBN-13: 978-1933184029
Product Dimensions:
5.5 x 1 x 8.2 inches
Shipping Weight: 12.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.6 out of 5 stars
102 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#21,408 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
I can't recommend this highly enough. I learned about temperaments several years ago, and have understood myself, my husband, and all kinds of people and relationships much better ever since. I think temperaments get to a much deeper level of personality than Myers-Briggs, and because there are only 4 basic types, anyone can achieve a deep understanding without always referencing books. I often teach temperaments to friends, and it's great to see their satisfaction as they realize why they have always reacted the way they do. If you want enough self-awareness to laugh at your personality as it causes trouble, this is for you.I believe I have read all the available temperament resources, and this is the best. It treats every temperament evenly, and emphasizes that each is good. There are a lot of anecdotes, and it is full of practical advice for dealing with each temperament and with each combination in various relationship types. It is accessible enough for a high school student and rich enough for a PhD.I also have the spouse version, which is a good addition to this one, but not as deep and not really necessary once you understand the basics. This is also better than, though very different from, The Emotions God Gave You.A final note : as the name implies, the authors are Christian, and advice for prayer is sprinkled occasionally throughout before it gets its own chapter. But the concepts are not Christian intrinsically, and the book would still be very helpful, though occasionally irritating, if you set all such references aside.
This book will help you better understand yourself and others. Once you've read it you won't be able to see people the same way again - things become quite a bit more clear and less frustrating once you understand the temperaments driving people's behavior. Makes forgiveness far easier.
This is an easy read! It was quite interesting to find out about the different temperaments: choleric (Type A), melancholic (picky), sanguine (salesman), and phlegmatic (couch potato). I took the quiz and tested as primarily choleric with melancholic, which I believe is accurate. Especially good are the sections that compare how different temperaments get along together. I found it to be true to life, especially the description of the role reversal that happens when a choleric woman marries a phlegmatic man.
Very enlightening. A little slow getting started but once in, the information is very good and should be a requirement for relationships of any kind. Very practical advise in getting along with your spouse and children who may have different temperaments. Better help than all the years of therapy and counseling. Has helped me appreciate the God given differences in our home rather than be frustrated by them. Only down side for me is that I am not Roman Catholic and there is a bit of the religious sprinkled throughout. Definitely not a reason to miss out on the great information, though.
I read about myers-briggs, the enniagram, and other personality frameworks my entire life. But this is the book that totally changed the way I relate to others in a down-to-earth, practical way. It teaches the tactics that are best for motivating each of the four basic temperaments, communicating with them, loving them, nurturing them, teaching them.My favorite thing about this book is the way it doesn't just treat people like machines or animals, but casts an incredible vision for the the way that you and I can go beyond the limitations of our temperament and grow into a fuller person every day.I would recommend this book to everyone who knows how to read and wants to know themselves and others.
On reading it, I've found that if one is truly "open" to learning about the strong points of the temperament of one's spouse, and what needs to be conquered in one's own temperament, it can actually "smooth the waters" and rough edges that are always present in any relationship between two "imperfect people in an imperfect world".The book also treats with our children's temperaments, which are never more visible than at the beginning of their life - and so easier to recognize in their "pure form" during their earlier years. How to resolve the natural conflicts that occur between their (and our) temperaments is worth the price of the book.Let me emphasize that such books should NEVER be used to try to correct your spouse's temperament (unless they ask for your help) - that is THEIR job, but only to correct your own failings. At the same time, such books will help you to realize the tremendous gift a spouse's temperament brought into your relationship (as well as your own gifts), and help refresh the good reasons you got together in the first place. It will also help you to know how to strengthen the weak points in your children's temperaments, prior to their becoming "independent".I highly recommend thsi book to all.The Temperament God Gave You: The Classic Key to Knowing Yourself, Getting Along with Others, and Growing Closer to the Lord
Since reading this book,I am constantly reminded of what I have learned about the different temperments. I have learned other personality traits in college, marriage preparation etc. but it is good to review it after you have children. When you learn that some of the behaviors which occur over and over again are related to their temperment and how these traits can be useful. I highly recommend this as a quick read for all parents interested in bettering their relationship and parenting of their children. I especially love that it relates temperments to saints, the bible and spiritual growth. though I found the tally chart at the very back the best in determining temperments. I would recommend starting to read the end first.
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